I'll Be the One by Lyla Lee
Synopsis
"Skye Shin has heard it all. Fat girls shouldn’t dance. Wear bright colors. Shouldn’t call attention to themselves. But Skye dreams of joining the glittering world of K-Pop, and to do that, she’s about to break all the rules that society, the media, and even her own mother, have set for girls like her.
She’ll challenge thousands of other performers in an internationally televised competition looking for the next K-pop star, and she’ll do it better than anyone else.
When Skye nails her audition, she’s immediately swept into a whirlwind of countless practices, shocking performances, and the drama that comes with reality TV. What she doesn’t count on are the highly fat-phobic beauty standards of the Korean pop entertainment industry, her sudden media fame and scrutiny, or the sparks that soon fly with her fellow competitor, Henry Cho.
But Skye has her sights on becoming the world’s first plus-sized K-pop star, and that means winning the competition—without losing herself."
My Thoughts
*Mild spoilers*
This book was pretty adorable and I was hooked almost immediately, needing desperately to know how this book ended. Despite being a YA book with a fairly predictable ending, the stakes felt real and I overall really enjoyed this book! Skye is so amazing and I wish I had just an ounce of her confidence.
I loved Skye so much. She put up with so much crap and kept her head up the whole time. She was not impervious to any of it, so it didn't feel fake and forced. She felt like a real person, who is beyond talented, and determined to prove everyone wrong. I loved that she was bi along with her love interest Henry. I feel like you so rarely see good male bi rep, so that made me really happy to see as well!
“You are beautiful... Don't let anyone, not even yourself, tell you any different.”
― Lyla Lee, I'll Be the One
I was less thrilled about the overwhelming amount of fat-shaming, bullying, and overall fatphobia. As an unapologetic fat girl who is entering a K-pop idol contest, I expected a certain amount of fatphobia in this one. It pretty much comes with the territory any time a character is unapologetically fat, because of course you can't just let the poor girl live her best life without reminding her at literally EVERY. SINGLE. TURN. that she's fat and therefore not deserving of even a modicum of respect. I will say, the bullying is called out and challenged. The characters closest to Skye are an amazing support team. The love interest is just the perfect kind of encouraging. There is a lot of wonderful moments in this book, but it also just felt so damn repetitive after awhile. Some of the bullying was beyond cruel and actually abusive especially from Skye's own mother. It's called out in the text as such, but the way she treats Skye is full-on emotional abuse and she never really apologizes for it. At least not in a way that has me convinced. And to complete the abusive cycle, Skye's father makes excuses for her mother's behavior as if that's supposed to make it ok. Fat people put up with this kind of hatefulness all the time and reading a whole book that reinforces it, while saying it’s not ok, but continuing to show it over and over again anyway was just extremely painful for me to read, who has heard many of the things that are said to Skye throughout my life.
That said, I did love this book. And Skye was such a joy to follow. I was rooting for her the whole time and I definitely recommend this book if you want an amazing fat MC who is determined to achieve her dreams no matter what anyone else thinks! I listened to this as an audiobook, which I don't necessarily recommend. I didn't love the narrator on this one.
Genre: lgbtqia+, contemporary
Representation: bi MC, lesbian side characters, fat MC, Korean-American MC
Content Warnings: MAJOR fatphobia, bullying, homophobia